24.02.2015

"My Johnny's...Heroes Time!"

Time for writing again about my HERO guys...
2 Johnnies: Johnny Cash and Johnny Depp..Oh yeah, baby!

Oh, Mr.Depp come to me...
I remember very well, that I got inspired by Johnny Depp super early in life.
I wasn't a celebrity crush,( believe it or not, I have never got one) IT was truly - just an acting inspiration.I love, how he is creating his characters, love hearing the story about the process behind it. Thanks to real people, he is bringing this roles to life etc.
Only recently, I have started watching his interviews, looking at special features on the DVD's with his films, and listen, really listen to his interviews...

Second Johnny, I am giving fair share portion of love is ...Johnny Cash.
For his voice, determination, personality, creativity and his "strong will "to go ahead
Against all odds.
I must admit, I was always aware of his music, as I hear his music often in clubs, That offers live music.I absolutely adore, that suddenly people around me become present and mindful, when they hear their beloved Hero.
To be super honest with you, I went much deeper in the subject,only when I watched " Walk the Line".
And found out more about his extraordinary life ( I love real life story type of films...even though part of it, it's always fictional) and open myself up for this talent, temper.It made me realised,why people really love him.Plus his husky voice...Never get bored- there is no way, anyone can sound any sexier than him....
Extraordinary talent, beautiful person.

When I look at Johnnie Depp, I feel hypnotised ( Aren't we all?!) I mean ' stopped' in this surreal way, like nothing and no one else exists ...very weird.
There is something crazy in his eyes.Yes, definitely He has eyes of a mad man.
For me, it's untouched diamond, as if he is somehow ' unfinished", perfect as He is.
Somehow, for me Mr. Depp is very "raw", when it comes to acting abilities and probably
That's why millions appreciate and love him, me including...
There was a film called " Rum Diary", which I really liked.
I was really admiring, how TRUTHFUL he is, with femme fatale his acting partner -
I was asking myself, if they have an affair ...?! As I was telling myself:
You can't really act this...Can you?
Months later, as I am finding out, he is marrying his acting partner ...Huh...
Was it love, was it the film chemistry and just work?- I will never know that.
I wish, a little bit, I could find that out, somehow...

Sometimes, I hear that, Johnny Cash was and will be always so famous and so huge, because he was such a controversial person.
I don't agree. Scandals aside, there is something that left, that we can be harshly objective with :
His music.
I know people, who were given to listen to him live.
I wish I could.What an experience that must have been.

Today it's Monday night.Go to old fashion place somewhere in London, where they are play live music- where you can drink, chill, talk to friends. Go.
Maybe I will meet me there.

Love you guys!
Joanna
Xxx

23.02.2015

"OSCAR FOR IDA!!!!!!!!!!"

I was planning to publish different post today, but as this great news came to me this morning...
I decided to write fresh and TALK about IDA.
Really proud to be polish today!Well, always proud, but today especially!
Huge success for polish film industry:Oscar for the foreign film!
Feel super happy in heart, that this very unusual film was apreciated in Hollywood.
I was talking so much lately, about being different and individual , about style and about being unique.This is exactly what IDA is...

Let's talk about Ida,shall we?
I saw it few weeks ago, and I must say, that this film stayed all this time in my mind.
It's very "weird".Very different from anything you saw before.
It's so special and unique in so many ways.
It's certainly heavy, emotional and not easy to watch.
Recommanding glass of wine with it, as it's quite slow pace as well.
I don't wanna tell you too much about it, as I hope you are going to see it...
If not for the love of Oscars or just good films, than to support beautiful polish film industry...

Script of IDA is throwing few curve balls, although it is a subject we all know well from films.
Very moving music and simple acting.There is NO acting.
There are people and their stories.Best beauty of all.
Visually, IDA suprises as well.
Black and White film , such a weird, unconventional framing...
Oscar nomination for Best Cinematography for IDA.Another success.
You can love it or you can hate it, but It is definitely worth to see this film.

This year's Oscar night was special for my Homeland.
4 Oscar nominations and One goes back to Poland.
First time in history polish film won Best Foreign Film.
Congratulations with all my heart to filmmakers, to director Paweł Pawlikowski back home.
Maybe one day I can get there too? Who knows...

I will write more about Oscars soon, at this very moment- it's very fresh, I really wanna have a peaceful moment to think about all and then share with you my thoughts...
Soon.Promise.

Love,
Xxx
Joanna

22.02.2015

"Barking....? Be an individual!"

I have been taking about personal style before, and how important it is, in acting. Being different means = you are unique.
Always liked the expression " leaving footprints as human being with our behaviour".
Where is, though, the line between being an " individual,unique artist" and simply a freak, who is losing it?
Huh, the line is very thin, I can tell you that! You have to be a bit of mad freak to be an actor- Or a successful actor... I should add.

Barking? What the fuck? I am actually, totally serious.
Yes, I bark sometimes. I mean literally.
I pretend to be a dog ( Animal experience from The Method) and : bark, smell and moan as a dog, or a puppy ...And to make it even more weird- I don't do it in privacy of my lovely apartment. I do it- of course - in public places, with non- actors friends to make it even more exciting...

Quite recently, I felt this urge in Waitrose, while I was after another bottle of red...
I must tell you, I had a huge acting satisfaction, when staff in the shop were looking for an actual " dog" as animals are not allowed in the store apparently...There was no dog, It was me.
Good acting that must have been!

Someone would say: Seeking attention...?!Not at all!Believe me, I got enough attention at work on day-to-day basis...So...what is it? Why?
Well, I think it's funny, silly, gives me a feeling of random freedom and made me happy, Made me smile and other people around me - despite of what they are thinking in the their heads.
That's what, my friends, I called be "an individual " as I have never seen anyone else doing it, The way I do it.

Getting more serious in the subject regarding acting inspirations...:
Well,I talked before- about inspiring each other- so much, and for me- you can be inspired by others,Even try to do, what they are doing ...without losing " your soul" and colour of YOU in the art.It is really possible, it's not stealing, nor copying it's YOUR interpretation, of how you see the world.It's YOUR truth and you can be very unique, you are creating something extraordinary- while your head is convincing you, the world have seen it already so many times...You couldn't have been more wrong here.

While I am thinking about all those genius acting minds- I'm sure Marlon Brando, Marilyn Monroe ( that one for sure!!!) or Meryl Streep or James Dean have must been convinced they are losing it...Their own individuality must have driven them crazy and took them to places,that no one even dream of...
Nevertheless, they have all created something absolutely magnificent and unforgettable.
I think we all have tools and super powers.
The only difference is, that those " special people" are not afraid to use them.
They are not scared to be different, unique and think " out of the box".If they fuck it up, they get up , shake it off and move on...

I don't have to go with the flow...and for Fuck Sake....if I wanna bark...let me bark.
Love you guys,
Xxx

Joanna

30.01.2015

"How Marlon Brando created Don Corleone"

I swear to You...If I can choose out of all men, dead and alive , fictional characters and real people -without a blink I would choose, for my husband to be:-) Don Vito Corleone...!
OHHH my god!
I wish, that one day, I can create a character, that is so irresistible, so breathtaking... Just Exactly like Marlon Brando did it -in The Godfather, one of my beloved films.

I don't know what is it: The Italian sexy arrogance.Being a proud men.Power.
I am not sure:Charm, sensitivity and being so strong and fragile,emotional - all in one..
Properly fucked-up...yet I really don't know a woman,that wouldn't go for it.
There are no men like this left on our planet, sadly!
I promise you,I checked. I went through tinder back to back twice and didn't see THAT.

How the fuck M.Brando create this iconic character ?
Did he wake up one day and said:
"Ok, I am going to be a bulldog in Coppola's new film?!"
Because I know for fact, that he was using this animal exercise from The Method for Vito Corleone and He Was inspired by this funny, yet warm and aggressive type of animal.
Look at his face! It's so obvious.I actually met a dog, that looks like him.
He lives ( still I hope ) in Tunbridge Wells...

Speaking of real places ...Do you know that place called Corleone actually exists- I really want to go there next time, I'm in Italy.

Ok, yes, Marlon was method... I can't help but wonder...- What is behind his successful process ?
I was thinking about it last few weeks.
I have an answer for you guys.
I think " less is more" for Brando in this film.
He is so careful, not to do too much.
He barely does anything.He IS there. That's it.

Also... maybe the whole " Vito Corleone phenomenon" is connected with the subject itself..
Drugs,money, killing people, family ,respect, religion, kindness...all this allowed Marlon Brando.
Create a character on proper foundation of cultural tradition and specific type of behaviour.

I always heard -constantly -stories, how alive, in a moment and so unpredictable Marlon always have been.On Broadway and In Actors Studio, or on film set.
That's why he was a real nightmare to work with.
Because you never ever know what he is going to do, on stage, in front on camera or...
To this acting partner...Scary,right?Even now, it's such a scary scenario and we are taking about things that has happened in 1972...speaking of going ahead of his time...Well done M.B.

Being unpredictable is something I hear lots about myself from not only directors and producers, but also friends and my partners even.
And it's always such a problem.
People cannot handle it, or maybe they just can't handle me.
Being unpredictable nowadays ( read: moody) is in rare times...just being a woman.

Yet, Marlon Brando, the most irresistible and sexy men ever was so "disturbed".
And thank God for that.
The decision is easy and making a choice of being " difficult and genius" or "Boring and average" has never been more simple.

Iconic subject deserve " iconic" picture...this is one of my beloved and most recognised pictures.
I was waiting long time to use it on JUST JOANNA ...now it seems to be the right post...

When did you see The Godfather last time? It has been too long, watch it with me tonight.
Love , hugs!
Xxx
Joanna

27.01.2015

"-T- I - M-E- ..tricky fucker...But does the trick!"

I got to think about time." Timing is everything, Joanna...." I heard repeatitly in Actors Studio, during my method classes.One sentence, out of many, that It just stuck in my head -for good.

I learned, with time, to be patient with myself.

I learned, that time sometimes solved itself problems and is giving better solutions to us, Fix proposals - which we would never even dream of...

The only thing, we need to do, is allowed time to pass, and let it take care of unfinished and unsolved cases,in much more elegant, graceful way.

Time is also more life experience for us, more distance to breathe in, all those emotional states,we have been in.

One of the most scary aspect of time for me, is that our feelings are fading away too.
Probably in many situations, It's good and heathy.
For me , as an actor it is really frightening.
It's almost like I want to grab on, and keep certain memory and certain feeling, as I want to use it later on , in my acting, yes, at work.I wanted to be fresh, authentic and create something,
That people will remember,something...well, one of a kind, let' say.

How many times, after great casting...When I didn't get the part-
I said to myself: "It's not that time, It wasn't meant to be for me this TIME"
And with smile, I let go.Next TIME.
Then - not once or twice,I saw what universe had for me planned already, and why
That was so much better from the original plan.
Or sometimes I, simply wasn't ready for THAT.
That is time showing me, and is giving me -what is best -in that very best moment.

Have you ever think , why we are meeting THAT person in that specific moment ?
I refuse to believe my life is run by a coincidence ( k??'?ns?d(?)ns / noun -a remarkable concurrence of events or circumstances without apparent causal connection).
Non,Ce n'est pas possible!
Too many good things happened.

Oh and remember - this is important with time:
You will get another chance:
To fall in love, to get the part, to get that agent and to have your 5 minutes,and everything
You ever dream of.You get another CHANCE!

The most beautiful thing is, that I wait no longer for THAT NEXT TIME.
I chose to live a little , instead.
Go on holidays, see my family and get drunk with friends.
And the moment I let go, time has done everything for me.
I could see over last year how much smoother my career has been going.

I got to think about my blog JUST JOANNA and one of my favourite posts above...
With time and passing weeks, I even like it more.
Somehow all my own thoughts have more sense, all -what I wanted to say to you, Got this flavour, which I didn't see, kind of missed out on, when I was writing it a while ago...

I am still a hard workaholic- well - at least I know that, I accept it and I am " work-in-progress".
Give me some time...Give me a year..

Wales, Dark Signal- me as KATE

Has it almost 5 months since I finished my feature film DARK SIGNAL in Wales..?
How ? When...? wtf...

Tick,tick,tick...That is the sound of your life running out...
...don't let your life run away from/ through you.

Emergency trip to Poland tomorrow...." Let's rush to love People, as they are gone way too quickly!"

Xxx
Joanna

25.01.2015

"Style...in fashion, in acting, in cooking, in sex... Life as we know it!"

Style, hm?
I always truly believe, that every morning , it is way more important for me, to select carefully my thoughts and ideas for the day...than clothes...I still agree with that statement ! ...However...:
Since I started this BLOG 6 months ago, I made lots of new friends in fashion district and...

Well, It is super exciting:American, French, English, German fashion bloggers and fashion designers=They are Not only my new FRiends,that are collaborating with me on regular basis, but also became huge part of my life, whether it comes to day-to-day wear, or my work- dressing up my " characters" on film set or assist with "big night out".It has been great!
I must admit:Thanks guys.

My little newcomer, which really made me happy.
What's up with that?
Little accessory, so much pleasure...thanks LV

It's strange, how life is leading us sometimes.It brings faces and creatives to our life in the most unexpected way...In fact, JUST JOANNA is such a crossover of unexpected events....so out of the blue...that sometimes I still cannot believe it is actually MY blog...
So ...style in fashion- Very important for an actress, isn't it?
What is Style?
It is a selection process, making decision to create a unique statement for outside world...

Lately spending fair amount of time in the kitchen ( as luckily I have someone to cook for) and realised, that every time I wanna achieve unforgettable flavour...!
I don't want my food to be fine or ordinary. That's not enough.
So I make choices and decisions...
Choosing ingredients...to get the desirable effect.
And choosing pieces of wardrobe to get " the desirable effect " too, in front of the mirror, everyday...

That's right.I spend a whole day choosing the right recipes, to pleasure my , very sensitive lately...taste.

It was a success, which motives me to cook more, and more and more...
But I know well, that's just my personality.

Choices in our private life. Style in sex?
Here I think I rather follow rule " go with a flow and do always what feels just right".
But that is a choice itself.
Allowing yourself to completely let go and do what you think is right, or not think at all for that matter...
So when you think about it, Style is our choice, or at least style is coming out of our choice,conscious or unconscious one, choice, that exists in, -Pretty much -every aspect of our life.Personally I am choosing ' freedom " style. Always I'm a bit torn inside, when I hear there are places out there in the world , that STILL doesn't allowed that.
Do what makes you happy and don't hurt anyone.For me that is just common sense, or...like to think of it as Style of my personal freedom.
Thank God, I live in place like London...

I heard from my fashion friend C.C " Joanna,hats are back" and there you go...
No one looked at me as a freak, maybe Londoners are just too busy to really notice each other...Either way - feeling like I have my personal space/style.

And finally Style in Acting...acting styles?
Such a thing exist even?? YES!
Once again, if you an actor ( or artist) your honest, sometimes super risky -choice-makes your work very unique. With every piece of your work ( every casting for example ) you are leaving your footprints and that is what, day by day, is creating your STYLE.

I was always a gambler in life: at work, and in relationships.
Choices and decisions... I think I worked out my own style at work ...pretty well.
15 years, huh? It does take time, for sure.
Good answer for the next time, when I wonder what I have been doing for last 15 years?!

I know now, every casting, every role I am creating on set, is really my OWN.
I owe every minute of my character's breath and wouldn't change a thing.
Because it is my STYLE...how I create a new person.My choice.My decision.
And I will happily deal with all the consequences.

Make you choice.
Hugging you All!
Xxx

4.01.2015

"Games,games...games...."

Seems like the whole world is playing a game.
All sorts of games.Sometimes I want to play too, but I don't know the rules.Ideas?Anyone?!

I really like games.
In facts, I love them so much- I decided to choose the profession for life, that allows me to participate in all sorts of games.Mind games.
As acting is a game.
"Subtext"-for example. You say one thing ( as character), but you mean often something completely Opposite.That's acting.Or part of it.
One of the very first "rules", I learned in drama school.

I love playing at work, but in life I prefer be very "see-through"...
Means straight forward, blunt, honest and to the point.
Maybe because, I truly believe it's a waste of time to play games with each other.
And also, if you play with fire, you can get burned or burn someone else.
That's a rule, I think- which is worth to remember.

I realise that in each country I have been living ( list is quite long ) -there are certain rules, you just need to follow, as you are part of the society. Dating, for example.
There is a special code,you need to follow- otherwise your behaviour can be taken: quickly...Very wrongly.I used to be careful and aware of all sorts of codes and signals!
But somehow in my early 30' I am more and more confident, games, behaviour codes And rules to follow are just not interesting for me anymore.
Cliche, but life is too short for it, and I much rather leave it all for work purposes..
It's more fun that way.
And more effective.
And at work you cannot harm anyone, as it's all "pretend".

Original phrase : "The rules of fair play do not apply in love and war." or more common:
All's fair in love and war...makes me smile.
I have a feeling, that over the years less " rules" apply to our day-to-day life, and freedom of behaviour and confidence of self-being has a new meaning...

" Less is more"
No games.Truth and life itself, raw emotions, feelings and thoughts mean MORE and are way, way more interesting than the best game ever.
Although, even for non- actors ....sometimes in certain life situations -it is easier to pretend, hide and " play the game" than face reality?Isn't it ?
Yeah, we all do it.

The most " magnifique" thing about life is, that we all are very fortunate to have a choice...
But...if the House always win, why Gamble?
Xxx
Just Joanna

29.12.2014

"Interstellar and Imitation Game..." must- see" new Releases... First films for you to put on "Neflex/ Love Film" list in the New Year...

Acha,That's gonna be a bit unusual, because most of the time- I'm VERY away From straight recommendations Of brands,companies or...even film titles..However- in this case : it's worth to talk about it, I think.I hardly ever go to the cinema ( no time it's shit excuse, but it is true )
Also I realised I am avoiding crowded,loud place...as much as I can...anyway-
I was very excited to see a movie, that I really actually wanted to see and had huge hopes for...
Evening turned to be a perfect date and I can't say I was disappointed in any way:-)
That made me want to go back to cinema super soon...to see next desired film.
I actually surprised myself with this odd super- duper sudden dA©sire... As French say;-)

INTERSTELLAR...

I like watching SciFi movies from time to time and Interstellar is the BEST one, that I have seen so far.I think one key point in Interstellar is, that the movie puts SciFi and reality together sooo well, and makes everything more realistic.When I was watching Interstellar, the background music just made me feel great. I still can't believe that a slow, gentle piano -could create such a tense atmosphere.
Everything had an answer at the end and everything could be understood quite easily.
From my view, I think it is the best movie that I have ever seen on this particular subject, not only because of the adventure, but also the humanity, the spirit of discovery...and acting?
Of course...I LOVE the acting - Matthew MC. is so hot :-) and breathtaking and so believable in every second of the film.Ahhh,I can't believe how amazing he is.I admire him so much for this role and I must admit - I honestly don't remember when I saw such a good, pure acting, raw emotions.
Beautiful !

And to my Date, J.D. - Yes, I know, it's not ideal for you to watch the film from the 1st! Row, but I must say...ROW A ...It gave me an extra pleasure - I have been feeling overwhelmed by the S.P.A.C.E...and I liked it! No headache- promise!

INTERSTELLAR...This film is most definitely highly recommended by me, although I can hear many negative opinions all around-I personally think it is worth it, for YOU to judge it yourself.
I think lots of people criticise the film, as they don't really have a realistic expectations towards this genre of this special film...
It's Sci-Fi and the most important: It's Christopher Nolan.
Expecting something realistic and " down to earth" ...it's like buying a cinema ticket for Winnie- The- Pooh and expecting acting comedy with car chasing scene...
Not really that direction.You can be easily disappointed, if that's what you are having in your head.

I love it.Every single minute.
In fact, the experience was so good, I had a desire to go to cinema again, super soon.
And So I did. I saw Imitation Game.Again I wasn't disappointed.Love it, For the storyline, acting and important subject that is key point in this super special film.

Let's focus on acting here, as at the end of the day, that's what JUST JOANNA is about...
Mr Benedict Cumberbatch ( Never will remember this name;) is funny, real and very,very convincing portraying his character. It is a difficult role to play, as he, as actor and creator -had to deal with historical facts In his creative acting process...Extra admiration for his work in this film for that reason.I actually never heard of him before.Personally I will keep an eye on him-professional curiosity-To find out, where his acting career path will take this individual.
I must say: Well Done!Oscar? Maybe...too early to think about it.

One of many new New Year's rules:
Joanna will go to cinema more often!Oh yeah!

Happy cinema time!
Xxx
J.

27.12.2014

27.12.2014 !!!! first little JUST JOANNA Anniversary

Happy first 6 months ( and one day) of Just JOANNA!
I cannot believe my desire to write and share my thoughts with you have been going on
For over 180 days already...

I wanna say big THANK YOU to all of you, who read and love my blog.
Special thanks to my Editor J.J and B.K my Webmaster.

Being inspired and inspire others has always been the key, when I started out one sunny day...
So much happend to me in the second half of 2014 and I was so happy to take you on that JOurney with me.I apreciate your support for my blog and Today I feel really proud, that so many people read, response and get inspired by JUST JOANNA.

My first post....Remember:-)?

While I have NO intension to stop my blog activity-nevertheless - there are going to be some changes , new exciting surprises...which I hope, will get you " involved " more in my ideas and productions.
Finally I will reveal my fashion brand supporters and also share with you few of my sponsors.
I am not sure where 2015 is going to take me ( and my blog ), but happily will continue professional work as an actor, of course, and my adventure with creative writing about acting/ film industry.

Music, Candles, Memories, Bali, Chilling Time...This is what I do, as...post-Xmas relaxation.
Stay warm,
Big hug,

Joanna
Xxx

24.12.2014

"Just Joanna Christmas..."

I love that picture...seems like such a relaaaaax Xmas..

Happy Holidays everyone!
I will be thinking especially about all those of you, who , like me,
Spend holiday season away from family home.
Nevertheless, I personally feel so grateful and lucky to have family all over the world, New York, Warsaw , few other places ...and London - of course.
My friends are my family and will have always special place in my heart.

Wish next year work allowed to spend more time with you All!
MERRY Xmas! Have a wonderful time, surrounded by the love ones!
Time full of laugh, happiness and full of only those memories, which you wish, could stay in your Mind for a long time!

Sending you lots, lots of love :

For the New Year 2015-
May all your Dreams come True and may your heart and mind be as open as never before
For new, exciting adventures, that life has for YOU!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2015 from Just Joanna.
Thanks for following my Blog.
Xxx
Hugs, kisses, love..
See you around in the New Year.

Something to finish YOUR YEAR with...

23.12.2014

Dating creatives...when A creative dates A creative...

Even I'm proud gemini (born in May) somehow ..winter (not spring) is my time!
It's magical, sensual and special time for me every year. Something extraordinary happens.
And now, after years of this kind of season ritual, I am not even suprised.
I'm , kind of, waiting for " THAT".
Analysing my adult life: most of my serious relationship or "something BIG "/significant ..happens ALWAYS in winter holiday season....and so let it be, I am officially excited.

This blog actually will be about something different, not about cold winter and strange vibe, when calendar hits December...
It's about dating.Aha-ha.I change my mind constantly.
Can't yet decide: Is it right, for actors, filmmakers to date people from their bubble?
Is it heathy? What are the benefits - standard pros and cons?
Is it good for your professional life ( if you are an artist) to share your personal life with " your half" ...someone, who happens to be an artist from your world too?

Well, well...
I took that " risk" quite a few times.

It didn't end up well for Me, as it didn't for Sienna M. and Jude L. either...
I don't want to make rule out of it...but Actor and Actress...most of the time, We hear about cases, that DIDN'T work, rather then the " happy ones"...

Ok:
Lets get serious here:
Good stuff - dating someone from your bubble =means they REALLY understand, what does it mean, to be an actor ( for example ) And you don't have explain anything, after 16 hour day on set...
Having the same desire : Often can be very motivating , you can inspire each other to work harder.Sharing the same passion can be really bonding, get you ever closer...
Ok, enough !
Now bad stuff: Well, you can't easily switched off, if you not careful, as you both in the same bubble-all the time...That doesn't sound very positive.
What else could be negative? 2 actors- too much drama?
NO castings - NO money ? Or sick level of jealousy, if one does better than other...?Hm...Interesting Miss Joanna.

"People who have been rejected in unceremonious ways often tell me they don’t want to open their hearts again.

I get it. But as actors, we must. To choose to move through life zombify-ing ourselves, becoming risk-averse, and anesthetizing and numbing ourselves so we don’t have to feel again, doesn’t serve us—as artists or people.

The fact that we numb something doesn’t mean that we still don’t feel it. It’s there. That’s why we’re trying to numb it! And as a storyteller you can only tell story through the feelings you share. So if you want to heal, you have to feel.

The good thing about dating a narcissist (besides being brave enough to leave) is that, chances are, you’re going to move through a shit-storm of feeling. Anger, resentment, sadness, pain, rejection, rage, vulnerability. If you get the lesson quickly, and move on, you can access and use all of that stuff in your work. Not through sense memory or substitution. Simply you survived challenges in life that have transformed you and you’ll always carry within you the emotional imprint that allexperiences have left you with.

So it’s a win-win because you have everything you will ever need inside you. And sometimes, the lesson can’t come without first being burned by it all. So all experiences are helpful in the long run, no matter how good or bad they seem at the time.

The key is to not repeat the lesson over and over. Like anything in our lives or career or art, it’s important to remember our worth—what we truly deserve; that letting go of something that doesn’t serve us is essential if we want to make room for something else to move into its place that does.

So thank those tricky people you’ve dated for the lessons they’ve afforded. They’ve made you a much better feeling actor than you could ever have imagined. But for gosh-sakes! Remember, there’s no need to go through it all again.

I was talking to an actor the other day who’s been having challenges with her representation for a while. I encouraged her to talk to them about the problem. You can’t fix anything if you pretend it’s not broken. Communication is the key. Everyone’s doing the best they can in this business at any given time, so it’s not about blame, but it is about getting more honest about what is—and isn’t—working in our lives."

Reading that made me realise that at the end , it's ALL about the PERSON you are dating, Not about what they do...at the end of the day.But -Somehow, I can't help, but wonder..How relavant is Our Job-for us as human beings though? How much our occupation shape us AS a Person?Back to square One.

Coming back to text above...Yes, I would say, always TALK.No matter what shit is happening ( when you are dating creative or non- creative one) go with the " JUST JOANNA way" be blunt, straight forward and honest.

T-A-L-K

Happy Dating!

Miss ( not Mrs ) Joanna

Xxxx

22.12.2014

Anja Rubik.. my Hero :-)

We really NEED to have HERO's our in life.
Well, I know I do.
She is beautiful, inspiring, inteligent and without any doubt -anytime in a day, I would say and admitt I want to be like HER.
I can't help, but wonder...What are the most desirable qualities, that I admire and that inspire.
Me so much....
Well, it's confidence, being successful,but not arrogant in the same time...
What else...Honesty,Generosity and kindness is super high on my list...
Anja got it ALL!
And it's interesting- this list it's not only in my mind, when someone asked me about my lifetime Idol,but Huh...also, when it comes to people I date, for example.
Or in professional life...film directors I desire so much to work with.

Who is SHE?
This beauty...Her name is Anja Rubik and in my opinion, she is the most Successful polish Model of our time...Need to tell all my special inspiration...:

Anja Rubik began her modeling career full-time soon after graduating from high school. She has been featured on the covers of various magazines, including French, Korean, Latin American, Japanese, Spanish, Australian, and German Vogue, Korean and French Numéro,Nylon and Elle. She has modeled for such designers/brands as Victoria's Secret, Shiatzy Chen, Givenchy, Chloé, Christian Dior, Hermes, Valentino, Gucci, H&M, GAP, Lanvin,Balmain, Belstaff, Armani, Lacoste, DKNY, Barneys New York, Jimmy Choo, Estee Lauder,Roberto Cavalli, and Chanel.She has also done haute couture for Valentino, Chanel,Christian Lacroix and Elie Saab and Polish jeweler Apart.She appeared in the 2009, 2010, and 2011 Victoria's Secret Fashion Shows.Vogue Paris declared her one of the top 30 models of the 2000s.Since 2010, she has appeared on Top Model. Zostań modelką, the Polish edition of America's Next Top Model.

Anja is featured in the 2011 Pirelli Calendar photographed by Karl Lagerfeld. She was one of the models to star in Lacoste's "new look" campaign in January, a different advertising concept for 2011 under the new tagline, "Unconventional Chic". The ads were shot by Mert and Marcus, showing models wearing the iconic white Lacoste polo shirts worn over fancy black evening wear.Rubik renewed her contract with Fendi for the third season in a row. In 2013 she was ranked third on Vogue's "Top 10 Models of 2013" list.In 2014 she became the host and a judge of the Polish version of the reality show Project Runway TVN.

She is a favourite model of Karl Lagerfeld.And certailnly mine,too.For many years now.
She was building her modelling career in NYC, when I was studying in Actors Studio in New York and I like to think, there is always something, we have in common.
It's quite amazing, how huge influence she had and still have on my life, personally.
On an odd day, when I am down, I read lots of interviews with her, which always cheer me up.
I can find out for example, how Anja for years was going all the way to the TOP, and how damn hard it was for her...And what she is doing ( on weird day,as we all have them sometimes) -when things goes not the way, she WANTS.How could she ever get it wrong?!
It's almost like having a spiritual mentor, someone you follow, gently all the time is present On the back of your mind...

Many,many of my photo shoots work is very much based and Influenced by Anja's work.I'm thinking a lot about how she is posing,Anja's make-up choices and wardrobe ( my personal day- to-day style is close to HERS, too) the atmosphere of the pictures, the ideas, the style, and unique vibe...It's definitely something, that stuck for good with me, and Thank God for that!

Some of my older pictures I am sharing with you here...as example of my Anja's inspiration.

I wonder ...Who is your "lifetime" Hero?
Xxx
Love, light, Big Hug.

Just Miss Joanna

30.11.2014

"Joey from "Friends" was right - : "Selfless good gigs don't exist"... Or... How not to be a selfish,jealous,self-distractive actor"

Uuuu, this is a touchy subject.
Let's talk about jealousy shall we? Being selfless and selfish. As an actor, we are concentrate so much on " ME".-my showreel, and my headshots and MY last casting...Me,me,me... I think in some way, this chapter of my life is inevitably closed. I think being selfish and jealous, as an actor, is actually strongly connected.I'll try to explain to you why I think that...

Let's go back in time. I was 17 or 18 years old, and for a few reasons I will not bother you with, for some time, before my A-levels, I was seeing a shrink on regular basis. I remember this like it was yesterday. I was explaining my difficult relationships with other classmates and people of my age, or even teachers for that matter, and suddenly my doctor started this conversation: -"Joanna, Have you ever heard of jealousy?
I'd never thought that other people might be simply jealous? This is the reason that they behave in certain ways towards you.
Can you understand that?" -" NO! I can't understand that at all. If I see something I really like, like someone winning something, making a dream come true or achieving a goal, I want to be like them. I instantly admire them, and think: Wow, I wish I could do a commercial, or I wish I could run a marathon, that's amazing! Then, get inspired and do what I can, to follow that inspiration." - Well, that's quite an unusual approach and you need to understand not that not everyone thinks this way... and there is nothing you can do about it.

Haha, well said, Doc. Certainly not everyone thinks like me! That's for sure...

How come actors get jealous? Because it's damn hard, when you are not working and all your friends around you are getting amazing jobs, roles, films and have thisperfect agent... Or even seeing actors on People's Magazines, when he is advertising his new film, or TV series... Exactly the same one, you have auditioned for...That's gonna hurt. For sure. Believe me, I have been there. On the other hand, I am / have been on the other side too.
I wish all my actors friends were as busy as I am. I help them where I can, but this industry can be a bitch and you need to grow tough skin to survive it. It wasn't ever easy for me either, talking about my film set in Jordan, when I know, that close actors friends...The love ones suffer and struggle.. Ok, so how I tightly connect being jealous to being selfish? Well, if you strongly believe that this role or film should BE YOURS, It's all about you, in a way...Reasonable explanations, that you are just not right for it this time, Won't help...Am I right? Because that is the role that should be "MINE". Also, it is very hard to not be jealous, if your best friends are doing amazingly and You just don't know how you are gonna pay the rent that month..How you can be truly happy for them? Well, I tell you how I deal with it and how I see it. It took some time to get to this conclusion, but Yes, I am there: I tell myself, ( if someone next to me is super successful- a good friend for example) that All these amazing things happen to other people around me,they are achieving...then tomorrow ALL that can happen to me too. Because If they can do it, I can do it as well.
I then get living proof in front of me, that IT IS possible. Is that not an easier, more helpful and less destructive attitude than to just be frustrated and angry, as someone standing next to us got it right? I think it's better to JUST smile to ALL those lucky winners at times. And have in mind you could be next!

Can we really be completely selfless?
Even -if you are doing something purely from your heart for another human being...
How does that make you feel about yourself? Good, right? So is that purely selfless?
Not sure I agree.
However, I like to watch myself, and make sure that it's not always about ME.
Just sounds like the right way to go..

Just Joanna
Xxx

29.11.2014

"Qu'est-ce Vous désirez?"

It's more difficult to answer that question that it seems...
We all have our desire. Some of them we religiously follow, whereas with others, we give up half- way through because it's either way too hard to get what we want, or we don't fancy " IT" anymore.
Recently, I was talking on JUST JOANNA about how powerful our memories can be for our future. Strong DESIRE can be so motivating too, as long as it' not our obsession..
If that's the case, then in my subjective opinion, they can be purely dangerous.

If you ask me anytime of the day I will tell you with a huge smile on my face my " 5 year plan" , my " 10 year plan" and the things/ goals/ dreams I REALLY desire. Everyday. More and More. Each year I can tick something off of the list and say I'm getting closer and closer to the other listed desires.
I realise that for most people, it is very difficult to say precisely & straightforwardly what they want.
I often hear from friends " I just want to be working, and I will do any job really, just to be surviving in the film industry".
Yeah, right. Well, I tell you what : That does not convince me at all!
You don't have to be Einstein to know that if you are serious about making it happen for yourself, you need to be a little more precise about your actions ( Energy - that you are putting in) ...and be honest, most of all with yourself, with what you actually want and why?!

"Everything is energy and that’s all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality. It can be no other way. This is not philosophy. This is physics." A.E.

Yes, let's stick to science and physics.That is what's working well for me lately...

My dream or desire or my goals, however you wanna call them, begun a long time ago. It's a strong, constantly pushing force, that is inspiring me always, and reminds me on a occasional day, when things just don't work out my way, why I'm doing all this hard work! And also, ( no matter how cheesy that sounds ) I always have this huge smile and have thais warm feeling inside, when I think about how happy I will be, when I finally get WHAT I WANT! !

"Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today" -Well said, Mr. Dean!

I dare to ask You...: What is your " 5 year plan"?
Xxx
Joanna

28.11.2014

"Different kind of " method" ....TAM for Actors..."

I am have a pleasure to introduce You all to Tracy Anderson Method.
I like talking about stuff, techniques, experiences, that inspires me -as I always believe, that even if only one person get hooked up to a new habit, lifestyle or an idea after what I wrote here-I was most definitely worth it, to published it on my JUST JOANNA blog....

Who is that sexy lady next to, even more sexy, 3 strange man?
It's Tracy Anderson, fitness guru for many,many people around the world...me including.

Tracy is personal trainer of beloved Gwyneth Paltrow and used-to-be Madonna trainer, too.
I got to know Tracy and her work about 4-5 years ago and instantly I loved her " method".
From time to time, when our life is changing in certain way,there is a shift like... In my case?-New feature film to do, lead role that - of course, have to be stunning and slim, or new M-A-N that I am dating just appear in my life or photo shoot for a Magazine cover-We do want to look amazing and sexy and we are looking for something:
Like a secret magic solution,that in short time without much effort, get us what we after...

Well, well...not with Tracy! Sorry to disappoint you.
No pain, no game, in this case I'm afraid.
It's super intense way of training, and none of HER method routine go easily on you!
But I must say the effect is really astonishing...
And believe it or not...After years of training with Tracy, my Ass is doing very well :-)
( Ask my new date, haha!!! J.D. Comments?) or at least is doing as well as Mrs. Gisele...

Ok:-) this picture here- supposed to motivate you all :-) as not far from now,one beautiful day: spring/summer Season WILL come and then all this effort - tears and sweat -will be so worth it!

We, actors, of course- have to take care of ourselves, not just our mind, but our body too!
We need to be psychically fit to be able to do our job!
More: it is our moral duty!
People always keep asking me, what I do...Yoga, Pilates ? Yes...Well, the truth is, that I do everything I can find!
Anything and everything I can get properly hooked to and truly enjoy it, Even it is hard to keep going on an odd day.

Feeling in super light mood today, so I'm writing to you with a smile and a bit of a blink...
But ok, seriously now:

Why this way of training is different from other form of exercise ?
You can read so much about it everywhere, but most important reason-Here we go:
TAM is design to restructure your muscles and give YOU exactly what you WANT.
So you can focus on your goal in particular part of your body and see results...well after few days really.
And I know it works well, it's not a magic trick, it's hard work and ...science!

Ask your google friend about it and try it...on YOURself.
And NO, no one pays me to say it's good...No f****ing way.

I think between TRACY and running at the gym and Yoga...I need to find time for steam room and sauna spa As winter came to LONDON..

Stay warm, love always!
Joanna

You can't create unless you believe you have options. If I believed that there were only so many ways to work around a joint, then I wouldn't have the ability to create balance where there is imbalance in the body muscularly while utilizing the power of the brain.

Opening new conversations with your coordination opens new neural pathways in your brain. That process utilizes more muscles than would normally be possible during your workout. We will begin a new routine together each Wednesday, and you and I will connect to each other in a dynamic and musical way. During that time, while following me to the rhythm of the music and mirroring my specifically designed program, you will connect more to yourself. You will have access to the cutting edge of what I am doing in real time. I will be able to connect more to you in a way that is strategically designed by me.

For the past 16 years, I have dedicated myself to creating the largest bank of fitness content in existence, based on the biological permission that we have to connect to the over 600 muscles in our body. We can be our most balanced and connected self through this method. Through this streaming program, I will awaken and empower in you, your most balanced body. I will help you to overcome the weaknesses that you may view as problematic. You will never plateau. You will perform, look and feel more youthful as you reconnect to what you haven't used since you were a young kid bouncing around the playground without judgement. I believe each of us needs to be supported to shine our own light as bright as possible. Through my research I discovered, very early on, that we are each truly unique in this world. We each have our own unique set of weaknesses, imbalances, tolerances, and truths of how we view and connect to ourselves.

I understand how to navigate people to achieve real results. This is why I have never done an app and is why I have yet to open hundreds of studios. I will spend an hour telling a young journalist what it really takes to get "red carpet ready" rather than give empty sound bites to the press. I have sat in dozens of meetings about different kinds of platform options. I just want to be as direct with you as possible because I really truly care. It is not about a few moves. It is not a "3 times per week" practice. It is not a cleanse or a radical diet. I will tell you what it takes. I will show up for you, authentically. I will do it with you.

I love my life's work. I am so happy to throw open the doors of my master class to all of you around the world. This amazing web connects us all. We are smart and so are our bodies and minds. We need strategy, efficiency, consistency, and support. You will get this by working out with me through each streaming video. I hope you will be inspired along the way. I have a great team and we are all here for you!

I am so excited to start this journey with each of you. All you need is a mat, 3 pound hand weights, 1.5 pound ankle weights and 2 pound ankle weights. I would prefer to get a healthy sweat out of you and to work with warm muscles. So if you are able to warm up the space you are in, that would be optimal. You will virtually be in the classroom with me. You will experience the class the way my gym clients do. New weekly routines will be delivered to you same day. When I teach, I am responsible for designing for you. I create the sequence right there in front of you. One of my amazing trainers is there, next to me, to write down the moves and sequences I do. She then cues me on the opposite side. That trainer will also take you through a separate breakdown of each move so that you can perfect them all over the 7 days and perform it as I designed. The truth of how you show up for and perform the workout becomes the truth of your results. We are ready. You are ready. Yay! Lets connect!

27.11.2014

"The power (palace ) of our memories..."

Memories are stored in our minds as we go on the road called life...and not that long ago I discovered how powerful our memory can be for us...and most of all,USEful!

It's ThanksGiving today..Perfect day to reflect on your life.
For long time I try to be very mindful and aware when it comes to collecting MY memories.
I am very selective and precise about what I wanna keep, REALLY wanna keep -in my head.
Selecting your thoughts,it's almost like "selecting your clothes every morning". It's a skill you need to learn first and then practice.

Most of all, the most important point I wanna make here, is , that in my life- Memories - some memories are so motivating for me: to keep going, to live and to reach my dreams.

7 years ago I remember when I came to London: I didn't know anyone, I know nothing about acting industry in the Uk and life in general.
In my first week I met with one friend - beautiful Actress (I met her in Lee Strasberg's Actors Studio in New York. Kirsty lives in Glasgow but happened to be in London -luckily for me, at that time) who was kind enough to meet me and tell me all I need to know to start my journey ...( Kirsty S. , if you are reading this: Always know, that none of all those wonderful things would never happened to me, if not Your Help and I always would be so grateful for that,it HAS been 7 years...time to catch up, huh? Love! Xxx)

Beginnings are always hard, but exciting....After few months I was thinking to myself:
London swallowed me ... in one piece...
Building new relationships in acting industry can be so challenging and just hard on you,
...Because people don't get back to you, mess you around and if you want to survive,you need quickly to build you own "bullshit detector", learn who, and when to trust or to say " f*uck off' and leave!

Now, I was walking along, one evening couple of weeks ago and was thinking to myself...
I owned the very same city.Place I felt , in times, completely overwhelmed me...
Now Ladies and Gentleman: I feel I'm in full control and own it.

I wanna share with you a little story.One of my best friends in London happened to be an actress.
As we share the same passion, we of course talk lots about acting and our professional life.
Her career is going better and better, but as every actor on our planet -sometimes things are slowing down for her...and then in a week or so pick up the pace again.
I observed that for months and months now.
I always always tell her - every time something good happened, to register and remember how it feels to be successful and happy with your acting career, so ...next time when things are slow,
She can come back in her head to that positive, rewarding feeling of being " just happy,working, satisfied actress" and that will help survive the difficult time.
That's what I do. For years now and it works! Try it?

As we experience L-I -F-E in professional and private situations, everyday : we are leaving our " footprints" everywhere and..it's so important to do it.
It doesn't matter, if you get the job or not.It's important,if you have been remembered and how You have been remembered...
And finally what you can get out of this memory, that experience for yourself and for your future...

Time for social experience - ready!!! So:
Get a pen and paper ( your diary if you have one ) and wrote down 5 the most amazing
Things that happened in your career...
Stuck it on the fridge or if not...( too private ) hide somewhere, where it's safe for you.
And next time something goes wrong ( career wise but not only) , get it out and think how AMAZING it feels when each or one of those successful stories happened to you...
I swear it works ...You will know your worse days will pass and ...That's all worth the hassle! Soo worth it..At the end.

Place, that I have a huge pleasure to visit ( for casting yet again) and always so happy to come back.Little dream factory...BBC Elstree Studios. Yeah, I had a casting this Monday.
It went great, I couldn't change a thing... and that's what I want to remember.

Love to you All, Happy Thanksgiving my friends!
Joanna
Xxx

17.11.2014

"Actors for Yoga"

I really do love Yoga. I checked probably all the Yoga Studios in London and always look for new inspiring classes...whereever I am. In New York. in Bali...or in my Islington.
I started my yoga journey over ten years ago and I honestly don't think I ever stop:-)

Actors often are required to be more mindful, aware and well-connected to their body, spirit and Be open to their emotions.Way more than other people.And I think it is right that we are expected to be all those things...Yoga seems to be for actors/ artists ( but not only) on a paper -a perfect way to get to know our SELF.

No wonder why I see more and more on the streets of London adverts for " Yoga for Actors" classes...
Like we need some kind of special process or special treatment :-)
Well, certailnly someone ( Ha! no just one person as it seems...)very rightly, thought it could be an idea to make good money.

Ok, so I decided to turn around this phrase..
Instead of thinking about what Yoga can " give " us actors, I wonder what we ( as those more mindful, open, more aware of our emotions ..human beings) can bring to the Yoga class ?
"Actors for Yoga?"
Do I have anything to offer when I decide to join group of London strangers to be practicing this beautiful physical,mental and spiritual practice or discipline, that aim to transform my body and mind ?

I dare to say : YES!
I can almost see and most definitely feel how my personal energy shift something in the air in Yoga Studio.To start with:I smile to people around me.For NO particular reason.
I am happy, healthy and there is really NO reason for me not to give a positive energy to a person next to me, who , like me, decide to dedicate 90 minutes or so ...to work on them - SELF.
It doesn't cost anything to bring something nice, positive and energising to the Space...
But somehow people don't really do it very often.Shame.

Yoga Class is a perfect place for that.
And I always thought Actors have such a great opportunity to create for example: Positive vibe...as at the end of the day, this is a huge part of our job: CREATE.

Winter is coming. Go to Yoga. And take an actor Friend :-) see what happens...
Love, Stay warm!Hot Chocolate and hot water bottles time:-)
Joanna
Xxx

Very excited to share my latest interview with you...Link!
http://www.dziennikpolski.co.uk/artykuly/2014/11/18/nie-ma-sukcesu-od-zaraz/
It's cool when people love what you do...and take interest in your work...Very cool!

31.10.2014

"Just Dark Joanna"

I almost always can find a reason to smile :-) but this one night I really could not.
This is gonna be BIG.Ready?!?
It was exactly 10 months ago: 31.12.2014...Yeah ...New Years Eve...
I decided to spend the " special" night with a guy, I just started dating.
Don't even know it was dating.We started "something".
Let's call him Mr .X ...how original...:-)

Anyway, skipping the night, we had fun ...bla-bla-bla...time to go home.
Mr.X and I were travelling in London at 3 am for Location 1 to location 2, when...
Well, it's NYE...too much of everything...:-(
He went crazy...not to say his behaviour was outrageous ...!
Neighbours called the police and before I know it I AM PART of this situation:

Six policemen are restraining Mr. X on the ground, while He is screaming, crying and Fighting back. Me? Well, I was lying on that pavement next to him and was crying and Begging him to calm down and stop fighting back before they actually gonna break his bones.
Of course, there was no way on earth, Mr X would listen to anything in the state he was...

Before I know it, next thing I see , is how Mr.X 's face is smashed on the pavement, blood...
It's raining... ( almost like a scene from a movie itself).
It was horrible, terrifying and traumatic.The worst of all for me -was, that I felt so helpless.
I want to help, I wanted to do SOMETHING, but I couldn't do ANYTHING!
And you really don't have to love the guy or care that much, I think....if you just human being with a heart inside ( like me) you will be shaken massively....by what I saw that night .I actually liked Mr.X Maybe that's why being helpless was an absolute THE worst feeling in the world.

If I could switch the place with Mr.X and be that person with that smashed face on the pavement, I would ! Any minute...crazy but The state I was in that moment was unbearable.
So what happens next ?
The police is taking Mr. X in the police car and...Me?
I stayed in that very same place on the ground sitting for more than an hour at 3 am ...1st of January 2014 and could not peeled myself off the ground, I literally could not move...

Ok, Why I am telling you all this? Here we go! BIG connection to my acting work...
I had 2 thought in my head :
First one...more general...How the fuck I get here....I mean HOW?!?

And more important...:
And second one....My acting brain forced me to register everything:
How I breathe, what I see, what I hear, what I feel, how fast my heart goes..
Everything... I was shaking, physically shaking.
There was a voice that was saying:
Joanna, Remember it all, YOU will USE it in future in the film, Register every single detail...
Acting process can mess you up for good.For life. That's right.
In THAT dramatic situation, I could not help, but wonder ...how I can use it in my acting...PART OF the process - That was not my choice.

And NOW 10 months later I am getting a script, a lead female role with such a similar SCENE
To play...Just change London to Goa, Mr.X to Nicholas Cage and left me where I was...
And we are having Bolly- Hollywood film...
How fucking unpredictable life can be, Huh?
Very.But I knew this is going to happened, 10 months ago ...somehow I really did.

The next day, I heard big apology from Mr. X ( as I should) and a promise, that one day we will talk about what that night was for me...
We actually never got to it.So here we go.
I never shared this story -the way I did now with you all and Now..well -it's a history -as part of my blog.

On a different note to finish off...
Friends are asking me what are my plans for this New Year's ?
And somehow I am very reluctant to do something at all.
I can't help but wonder ....huh, Maybe I should stay at home and go to sleep?

As I really don't fancy going to police station on January 1st ...in 2015 as well!

Stay safe! It's crazy world out there, with lots of crazies!
As Duncan ( my good friend) says, LoVE and Light!

Joanna
x

Ps.Pictures ( Stills) to this Blog comes from films, where I played very dark characters,
Messed- up people...as we all have " that dark" part in us...

30.10.2014

"Who says I don't act in life...?!? ...Backstage of SCOPIA premiere..."

Well, well...We all act in life :-) I think...
I certailnly do, and not just because I am an actor and that's my job.
Sometimes is easier/more comfortable/ more suitable to just hide our real feelings, Hide some dark thoughts that we all have in your minds, and say or behave in specific way as " the situation " requires it from us. Following some sort of code.Behaviour code.
Don't you agree?

"With any part you play, there is a certain amount of yourself in it. There has to be, otherwise it's just not acting. It's lying." - I didn't say that.Johnny Depp said it and I agree so much with him.

Following my thoughts for previous blogs here, if acting is a state of being, not a state of pretending, we ALL act all the time.The only difference is, Actors additionally have to deal with Imaginery circumstances of the world that was created as artistic process...to make a film, to tell the story.And they are filmed, of course.

My Scopia night :-) -What was I acting AS that night then?

I was An actress, who ACT that she feels probably more comfortable with "celebrity treatment" that she actually is...I can get used to that, I think:-)

I love my night though.Scopia had a premiere at Leicester Sq in Empire Cinema and it was so beautiful and so moving to see the film with an audience on a big screen. I was touched and moved every second- I have been waiting 4 years for that moment.
To make the event even more special, SCOPIA was premiered during British Horror Film Festival. We got 4 nominations, 1 Award for Best Cinematography.
And I could not be more proud or more happy.
I was nominated first time for performance in Feature film for BEST ACTRESS and getting so much attention regarding my acting work.It felt ...well...-odd and well- deserved in the same time.
It was very surreal night.
Night that I will never forget.For SCOPIA I know it's a beginning of the journey, more Awards,
Distribution in many countries...So much to look foward to.

Again....I feel very grateful for huge, amazing support I got, in this life changing event for me.Thank you so much.To all my friends, strangers, fans, My blog readers,my family, facebook and twitter followers,and many many directors, actors,Producers that were there for me with all their hearts.I certailnly FELT that.
WOW.
Life is Beautiful.

J.

12.10.2014

"New York, New heart..."

New York City has a very special place in my heart and always will have. No matter where I live now and how far I am...
I heard that 'Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.'
And that's a sentence that fits perfect to NYC.And by saying that I don't have just 9/11 in mind...
New York is a place, where all your dreams crush with the reality ( such a " rat race" city) and new ideas and goals appear and materialise them self...over night in same cases - if you lucky.

This picture below is following me everywhere and anywhere, wherever I go...since I left NYC in 2007.It's just so iconic and powerful.How come there is a place in the world where you feel everything is possible and so available to us?

Let's talk about what NYC is for me...
Why I moved from Warsaw over the Atlantic ?
I wanted new " me", I wanted " new experience ", I wanted something fresh ... And ...
Of course, I wanted to be in legendary Lee Strasberg Actors Studio and in fact, I felt I got that "gift" from the city from Day One, everything I believed I know about acting and myself too...Well...it was totally destroyed, ruined,washed away from my mind.
And I was calmed about it.I was very ready and open for everything new that life has for me.
I often refer my studies in NYC as " brain wash" experience, but only in a good way.
I felt like I had to have a clean mind, start from the scratch so I can absorbed everything like a dry sponge...New technique, METHOD acting- Wow, it feels like it's all started yesterday..
It's almost like I got a " new heart" ..new heart beat. I started to be mindful in life and at work.
I started see things differently. And I am so grateful for that.
It was such a transformation- and without leaving everything behind me, it would not be possible.
Ruin is a chance for NEW start. I always try to remember that.
New York " experience" was truly an American dream to me, from the beginning to the end, Such an extraordinary time in my life which I never forget.

In New York I met many wonderful people, few of them I always call " my New York family" and Even far away and not always in touch, we always pick up when we left off.
Like time and distance will never be able to divide us.
Amy, Rob, Cole and Dora: I'm dedicating this post to you guys and remember "you always with me, as I always have you in my heart."

Love,
Xoxo ( the New York way )
Joanna

08.10.2014

Eat, pray and get ...just this one fucking casting!

I'm really doing well lately.I have been working constantly : Blood Brothers in Jordan, few films in London during summer time, and feature Dark Signal in Wales in Autumn, and back to London so I can do the lead in a play....And now...My first week to reality of castings ( 6 to be exact and more coming everyday;-) and more industry meetings ALL THE TIME.I would not dare to complain, but it can be exhausting and overwhelming sometimes...
Last week when I was back on casting track, I got to think lots about expectations, dreams and never ending wish list....
Not that long time ago,when I was on my way to Wales to start filming DARK SIGNAL I was telling myself, "If only I can do a play, I miss theatre" BOOM ...Next thing I know,I am in the play !
Later on, I keep day dreaming ....iF only I can get a casting for big Commercial. Really, huge one...Boom! My agent is calling with advert casting for huge Alcohol brand this week..
And later on...I wanted casting for BIG period BBC TV series and so it is...it happening on Friday morning...haha=> Be careful what you wish for, Joanna!

I realised I was so busy lately with planning, and setting myself constantly next goals and dreams, that I " FORGOT " to enjoy myself more, and realised this is ALL amazing stuff, that are happening right now, I am kind of missing it all, because I am too focused to reach the next " level....The problem is, ( and curse and blessing in the same time) there is always going to be next thing....but life goes on and I do need to STOP to tell myself how amazing everything that has been happening NOW is...This blog ...JUST JOANNA, for example, keep me away from being insane, get me more work, free clothes, and got more emails than ever....24ooo readers...Huh!? Who would it thought ?! For sure not me, when I was writing to you the first time!

It is a bit unsettling and bizarre feeling, to be back to castings...I am not gonna lie:-(
It's not that I'm thinking I am so fucking great, I shouldn't have to audition anymore, no way!
It's just weird after months and months of constant work, be back where I was, fighting for new roles...But that's the game and I am diving in ! Now!Go!

On the different note, coming back to the title of my BLOG today, I see how my actors friends are holding up to this idea, THAT this one casting will change their life...Sad! As I know very well, it's an illusion from the beginning to the end, WE are the only people that can change our life, none of any castings in the world will do it for us...

Miss Joanna on Stage..back to BLACK, Huh?

I wouldn't be myself if I didn't tell you about my premiere and my play run.
Well, it was fucking great. I wasn't nervous in any way.Just pure excitement!
I couldn't wait to be back on stage, perform in front of an audience and just enjoy that energy, That very special moment, again and again ....and again!
I got amazing feedback, so many wonderful,heart moving comments and I must say:
That means a world to me!
Again, I can confirm my feeling that it doesn't really matter if I am doing feature film, a play on stage or tv series...acting is acting and as long I work on a production that I think,its worth to put my heart in, I AM there.I am HAPPY.
Thanks so much to all of you,who made it to the theatre and THANK you for all warm and kind words:-) in emails, texts, Facebook & Twitter messages and everywhere else....:-) loving that!
Thanks to lovely friends too, to be there for me: A.K, N.M, B.W., And M.W. Love u guys.

Love...Peace...Stay warm ...Indian Summer is ...GONE.
J.

29.09.2014

"Casting judgement...we judge because we like it....Or???"

Maybe it's part of our job.
To have very subjective judgement about our casting, about who we are,And what we did/do.Crossing the casting door, we never know what to expect, what is going to happen, and as scary and as exciting it is, we - of course- always willing to take the risk.

This is what I found lately: "The Harvard psychologist, DR. ELLEN LANGER, says that when we’re not mindful, we are “Frequently in error, never in doubt.”
We go to an audition and do a great job in the moment. But later, we process it in error and instead see only the mistakes we made. The fumbled lines or the nervousness or the awkward moments we experienced. We then retell the same story differently. Meaning, we no longer believe we did a great job – we instead have no doubt about how bad we were. And that becomes the defining story of ourselves we tell.

If mindlessness makes us be frequently in error, never in doubt, then we become skewed toward seeing things incorrectly, and we don’t doubt seeing things incorrectly.

What that does is create a closed system. We begin to see the world – the business, people, relationships, our possibilities as actors – in a pre-set, determined, and often, limited way."

I put it on Facebook and got many responses..I can't help, but wonder how much of a judgement factor effect our life and our career?!So important -what mind set Actors have...It's crucial.

Yes, It's fucking hard, if you judged left and right. And rejected, has been smashed to the bottom and try to get up again and fight back.And again and again...and again.

As actor, working for 15 years, I has been constantly JUDGED all my life.
I has been judging myself and my work lots in the past and had dwell on every single audition.
I wasn't kind to myself.
I think, to tell you the truth, I have been harsh to myself.

And now?
Do I care?I honestly with big smile on my face can say! NOT ANYMORE.
The moment I stop analyzing and judging my casting and performance and I stopped thinking about how Others judge me as Actress and what score they put on my work, the MOMENT I really let go...things really has speeded up for me and my acting career really took off...Worth trying?

I have been working on a play this September.Playing Lead Role- Petra in beautiful, very moving story.
Rehearsal process has been long, draining and emotional, so tiring...but also, very very rewarding in so many ways, I cannot even list here.

I realised how much my colleague actors judge them self, apologise for their " acting" mistakes or for being fake in particular moment or scene.I didn't comment on that, I just smiled and thought:
Why are you so unkind to yourself,so unsure and so apologetic to all of us?
For me the rehearsal time, is where everything is happening from scratch, there is no right and wrong, If a scene is " not there yet" ,it's because the time we have put in and work we did, wasn't JUST ENOUGH " to get there ( wherever THAT is?!) and it is perfect for THAT moment being.

My play Is nominated for very prestigious Kenneth Branagh Award,if you have time, come to see the show, Me on stage :-) or even say : "Hello" ...link below.

Love to you all,
Joanna
x

http://tickets.firestationartscentre.com/Sales/firestation-centre-for-arts-and-culture/spaces/The-Auditorium/The-Kenneth-Branagh-Award-for-New-Drama-Writing

The Kenneth Branagh Award for New Drama Writing 'I am delighted to sponsor this writing award and to be a small part of the Windsor Fringe initiative that supports new writers. Without a good play or script, the best actors and directors in the world cannot...

18.09.2014

This is a special edition of my post 13 ( lucky??!) here ...as I decided to dedicate it to all amazing people I worked with on DARK SIGNAL! The whole world deserve to know how grateful I am...

It's my speech from Wrap Party which I read on our last day:

"I wanna start with telling you how grateful I am to the whole crew ,to each single one of you For your hard work on this production over last month.
Big thank you! Thank you so so much! I have a huge respect for you all, for putting your heart into this film and for everything you have done.
There is nothing more that I can ever dream of or wish for -than working with people that Are so passionate about making a great film, and have that spark in the eyes and love for What they doing. So simple and not so often I can see that.
I have a whole wrap party night to say thank you to you individually, there are just Few people I would like to mention now:

2 wonderful gentleman : Ed and Jonas,
Well, firstly Thank you so much for bringing all of us together, For creating our team here, without you guys none of this would ever have happened. Well done for getting all of this wonderful personalities in one room!
Thank you for trusting me with challenging,demanding and beautiful Lead character as Kate is , it was an extraordinary experience to be her for 2 months of my life.

Jonas, thank you for being super helpful with everything I ever asked for, You are excellent with defusing problems,you are very diplomatic and my special thanks to you for remaining Calm all the way through.

Ed, well there is so many things I am so fucking grateful, I think one of the most important things for me is, that I have your support all the way through, You honesty, your directions, clarity.You never question my way of working, my method, And always allowed me to have a space to be creative.Thank you so much!
I am very proud of our collaboration.

I know the film now is in safe hands, and no matter what will happened with it from tomorrow, This film and Kate will always have a very special place in my heart.

The energy thats just behind the camera can really effect my work and my process, therefore I want to say thank you to Adrian for being super calm and relax around me when I knew and i saw the situation was stressful and when we all were under huge pressure to make just the shot done.

I want to say BIG thanks to my girls from Make-Up and Wardrobe: Nicky, Becky, Kim, Char and Vicky for all your hard work on my " fucked-up" look.

It was so realistic and certainly helped me to create a " real" person" in the film.

Special Thanks to Kix, for being so wonderful to me, helpful and made the reality of the set locations so believable to me..

Before the Nick's....( My lovely Readers..I can't tell you what scene I am talking about here) scene I wrote a letter which I asked Ed to read during production meeting on that day of filming. I was asking you for support, understanding, and not taking my acting process personal in any way on that day,and for giving me special space for that particular very important for me scene in the film.
Again, I am really grateful to you for respecting my acting process, every single person Was so understanding and supportive and that's very touching and moving for me that everyone followed what I asked for.
Thank you for that!

There is always a person in the crew that I called a " good ghost " of the production.
I was lucky enough to see we have at least 3 of them...
3 people that are always happy, never stressed or miserable, always so so kean to help with whatever Is to do and always bring positive energy and have big smile on their faces:its our runner Gareth, Simon, and Laura!Well done guys, thanks for bringing positive spirit here, you are so inspiring and I have so much to learn from you!

I want to say BIG THAnk you to all beautiful actors I have a pleasure to work with. Even though, with few wonderful ladies I did not have a chance to work much in actual scenes, It was an amazing experience to have many conversations, over this special time I spend here, I felt your support, appreciate your help and enjoyed real connection which is something I craved for a while,So thank you very much for being there for me.
Big thanks to my main screen partners : Gareth and Duncan:

Gareth, Thank you for respecting my way of working, I know our approach to acting is quite different, I always felt I have your support and space I needed to have.
Sorry for biting your lip! Hope it will be worth it when we see that scene on big screen.

Duncan, well... thank you for endless amount of rehearsals that I needed, thanks for your patience, and for big calm and supportive when I didn't expected at all and probably needed the most.Despite of, how it can look for all of you, I really enjoyed working with you, Duncan.
There is the " KATE" part of me that loves you very much and that's very real to me.

I learned a lot here, as an actress and as a person. IT was such a valuable experience And I will always thank my lucky star that I was blessed and so lucky to be part of this film.
I feel very proud of what we achieved, I feel I am just a little part of this huge machine, I am the luckiest girl in the world right now! And I really can't wait now to see the effect of our hard work.

Thank you guys so much!

Peace and love...
Joanna"

f Part of me is very sad my journey with KATE is really over.
Looking forward to see the film on the big screen...
Special Thanks to my dear friend Paul for recommending me for is production.

Love
Joanna

13.09.2014

"Actors on tinder....Yes, I'm a tinder actor!"

Well, well...I found somewhere on internet a result of an interesting survey...
Which is the most comman occupation from all Tinder users?!
Actors.Of course...Is it that obvious though?
If you are over 30, living in London, have a busy career life and you are over emotional, Drained from everyday drama, you may need a little help, when It comes to find a date.
The perfect date.

Why there are so many actors on Dating App like Tinder??
I know why I am on Tinder.I tell you why:Because I don't really want date People from my industry And 99 per-cent of my time I spend ironically-at Work!!! surrounded by People from my industry.That's it.That's the reason.

Maybe the other reason is, why tinder actors are so comman,is that as self-employed - actors, always have iiregular schedule...have lots of time in their hands ( not me anyway) And it's just easy to " play" on Tinder...In Australia aparently is a sex App. In London I think it is a truely dating App,but I may be wrong?! I can't help, but wonder how much of an impact acting profession have on actor's life and their desicion making process?Would you say actors are "more brave", when it comes to taking all sorts of risk than People with " normal" jobs?

The other reason, that comes to my head to anwser the question :why there are so many of us, looking for dates online ...Ok-Let's be honest :
We need drama :-) we really do, and when we don't get enough of it at work,than something like Tinder may be temporarly a Replacement in a way.Let's face it. It is so exciting/ risky=dangerous on odd occasions, as believe me, there are a lot of freaks out there...and we-actors, like to gamble,don't we...?

Lots of actors I know are quite naive, me including, dreamer type...no judgement, just a fact!
Maybe some of us, believe and try to find the " one"?
That's such an overrated idea for me...One soulmate in the lifetime?
And if I don't find them on Tinder, than what?
Should I shoot myself right now?

Love, love, love...crazy love
J.

09.09.2014

"Mama told me not too waste my life, spread your wings my little butterfly... "

That's right.And I always listen to my mom, or almost always:-)
This year was been such a roller coaster ...4 months in Jordan filming TV series, 7 weeks in London when I managed to do 5 films and now 5 weeks in Wales, I will wrap this feature film on the 14th of September and start rehearsals for exciting play in London on the 15th...
I'm certainly not wasting ANY time lately...

Few years ago after seeing EDIE in Factory Girl I said to myself I wanna live everyday like it's my last day, and quite successfully I am following that thought.

Use time to maximum, I see my actors friends wasting so much time, I keep motivating everyone around me as much as I can....Continuously....There is something strange about artists, which allowed them to have a relax attitude towards work and life in general and ...sadly that's when the time is wasted most of all...
I always believe key to success is taking YOUR career in your hands...not waiting around and wasting time ( yeah right: because one day agent gonna call with perfect casting for perfect role...!?) Oh wake up!!!

Well, at the end of the day, life is too short to do anything that does NOT make you happy.
As it happened for me, there is nothing else that makes me as happy as acting=my work and I would never waste a minute for " unnecessary " activities...

Again,somehow in this very right moment I feel so blessed, grateful and just so lucky..., that my lifetime passion has become for me a way to make a living!
Love and light
X
Joanna

05.09.2014

"Am I.....?

On Method Acting Part 1 ...Am I crazy? Am I a method Actor?
Isn't it the same thing?

Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, Daniel Day- Lewis...and me and many,many others like my beloved Marilyn Monroe.
Big names and...such an extraordinary examples of Method Acting.
What is really to be a method actor?I often say that as second sentence when I'm introducing myself ( first sentence is ...my name is Joanna;)
Well,for me it is as simple as the fact, that I AM the character I'm playing.
The moment I start working on new role, I become a new ME.
That's it.
The character I'm playing is me in imaginery circumstances.
If I'm sick with fever, my character is , as well.That's why every scene I'm playing again and again it's ALWAYS different within a reason, of course.A little bit different, always alive, changing just enough for me to know it's fresh reaction, just like in life, facing the same situation I react different everytime...

Is it dangerous?
That it mean I am crazy? Completely losing my mind by following this process?
Well...certailnly, feel that way on odd occasions..

Giving that subject more thoughts, I cant help but wonder....
Maybe it is the world that went completely crazy ? And I am where I was, constantly contain and calm, just following the acting process, which seems to me it doesn't fit anymore the changing reality of our modern times.

In Actors Studio I often heard " Do whatever makes you happy, choose very carefully what works for you the best". I'm a method actor and it does makes me happy.I am sure over the years, I did many modifications and developed my own method and that is really, what works for me...the best.
With traditional training of the method, I feel I have a safety net, something I can fall back on, when I am stuck.

Again,in NYC while I was training, I heard lots from one of my favorite teachers: "Joanna, You use the method when the talent is stuck.Most of the time , the acting talent you have does the job for you,On rare occasions in future- when its just NOT there for you, you can use the method."
And that's what I did, ever since.

Love and light to you...
Joanna

27.08.2014

Adrena(line) ....THE buzz on set it's like a drug...

Here is me on my latest set in Wales while we were filming scenes in the car...

Hi You guys!
For last 2.5 weeks I have been filming my latest feature DARK SIGNAL..as you know already!
I feel Like I'm on "super happy drug" all the time, all day long. I'm always shocked that everytime I'm starting work on something new- it feels like I am on film set first time in my life...Everytime !!! -I'm getting this rush,know what I mean? ...

It's going great so far- of course I'm feeling exhausted, emotionally drained most of the time...
Tight schedule as per usual is on and I feel everyone involved are a bit stressed, most definitely under pressure...Crew and cast- every single person! want to do the job the best... they only can...Then I know, I am so lucky because I am surrounded by professionals with passion for Filmmaking, with passion for telling the story...

So let's TALK about comparing acting to drug addiction...
Harsh words...Well, I'm definitely think that being an actor is less harmful than be A drug addict for sure...This is my blog and I can only speak for myself...from My own experiences...but I know I am not alone here:
Something is happening in my brain, in my mind, even in my stomach, when I'm experiencing.
The very VERY specific energy that is present on film set.
It's slightly different every time, but it has very similar impact on me each time.

DARK SIGNAL- me as KATE

Heartbeat that goes faster and suddenly you are becoming very aware of it and very mindful, very present.Rush of adrenaline, blood is going faster through your veins and you just know-
Something is going on, SOMETHING is about to happen and it's inevitable.As an actor you have such an enormous effect on your actors partners, crew and even the...space that you are in.

And you know what?
This is probably one of the reasons, why I love acting so much.
I just really enjoy that FEELING, there is NO OTHER feeling like that.
And at the end of the day...Creating films,Acting, building characters, coming up with emotions in scenes, finding YOUR truth in the moment , all that...... is supposed to be FUN, most of all.

It's so, so much more than work for me and I am so sure of it.
I do have a lot of fun while I'm working... like on picture above ;-)
Love to you all...
J.

16.08.2014

Scopia Obsession....!

June 2010...Over 4 years ago something absolutely incredible and wonderful has happened to me.I won the casting and got cast as a lead in feature film SCOPIA.
And that changed my life.Inevitably.
I have been acting for 15 years.I have been in more that 130 productions in my life.
And...SCOPIA is the ONE.The feature film and role I have been waiting all my life.
It's my baby :-) I had, with the director/ writer of the film,Christopher Butler.No matter what happens in future with my career, Basia- the character I'm playing, will always have a very special place in my heart.
I was working on this production for 4 years! Can you believe that?!
For 48 months a person- a friend, was living in my heart, in my mind and somehow I don't think
I will be ever able to let go of HER completely.

Scopia is...very emotional film about reincarnation, and about finding yourself.
As a method actor, I took this role super seriously. I went through all traumatic, emotional states, as everything in the story really has happened to me.
I was shaken so many times to my very core.

I remember one particular day on set -very well.
I was doing a very dramatic scene.I was crying and screaming,lying on the floor as I was so traumatised and scared .... I even literally could not move.
After I heard "CUT" , I couldn't move, couldn't breathe and couldn't stop crying.The scene was still going on for me.There was no way I could stop at that moment.
The director, Chris was there for me...He was shouting..." Everyone, out, get the f...out of here!
I need to be with Joanna."And then he was lying next to me.Patiently,he was repeating, that I am safe and that the scene was amazing, while he was cuddling me on cold floor.I will never forget that day.In that very specific moment I realised,how far I am able to go ...to get what I want - not just on acting, in life too.
Of course, I calmed down after a while and followed the schedule and next scenes..

SCOPIA is doing so well and I am so proud of this film.I am absolutely obsessed- in a good way:
I will be updating you all with progress,(We had already our accent in Cannes) festivals news, and of course! theatrical release in the Uk, Us and everywhere else in the world....Coming very, very soon...
J.

14.08.2014

My secret friend took over my life...;-) character development...

Do you remember my first post when I told you about my new feature film DARK SIGNAL, where I am playing lead role KATE? Link below, if wanna read more about this production...

Yes, So I'm in Wales now and I am working hard for last week to be Kate.
It's fucking hard, because she is a complicated person ( who isn't?....)
So, so many emotional scenes...First few days :I am bonding with my new film family, chat to everyone,doing first script table readings, first rehearsals, fights set ups,costume fittings - all that...
So exciting and so scary in the same time!
I am super lucky because everyone -cast and crew are super professional and really nice, friendly,warm people.And they are equally, as I am, fascinated and passioned about -what we are, just in couple of days, going to create. Soon. Very soon.I really can't wait.

I am in love with a character named Nick in the story - My Kate is in love with Nick, and I am doing all I can: to fell in love, to look at my acting partner with desire and kindness, and create the chemistry we need, to make all our scenes work.
The moment I met my acting partner, I started right away look at him as character ( as Kate is looking at Nick, not Joanna is looking at....)
It does sounds crazy, but that's what I need to do.I must admit I am quite successful so far.
I am convinced by the time we will be filming our scenes, I will feel love, real love in heart and I know if I believe in it, make it real for myself, it will be real for the audience and everyone who see this film...

This is it- My journey is on and I am so happy.
I've even convinced my scene partner to do my exercises from Actors Studio and that helped me to get closer to the guy.
Such a funny job, in a month time - It will all going to feel as it has never happened or as
It has been a dream...just Joanna's dream...

http://www.empireonline.com/news/story.asp?NID=41905

Link to my feature film, so you guys know what I am up to, and why I don't write as often....
I am busy working!Character development!
J.

1.08.2014

To kiss or not to kiss ....This is a question!???

I would say: KISS! I like kissing. A lot, with a boy or a girl ( only pretty ones :-)- in life and on screen. I am not gonna lie about it. I enjoy kissing with other actors and I'm always very excited about it. Its a bit weird when you are allowed to KISS or even be very intimate with another person, without cheating on anyone, you actually have legit permission to do it at work. That's right. It doesn't matter if you single,in relationship or married with 2 kids. They are paying you to do it.
And this is part of the JOB.

Few years ago I was playing a role, Anja, in a play in Royal Theatre in London.
There was one scene, in which I was intimate with another, hot Jamaican type actor and we had a kissing scene. On the day of the premiere, my Boyfriend at the time, J.G, was sitting in the audience. In the 5th row, and to make this event even more interesting, he was watching the play with HIS family....
Ok, come on...That must have been a bit weird...for him.
After my excellent performance;-) Everyone was asking him about the kissing scene, of course....if I remember rightly, HE said something like that:
" Well,its ok. I'm fine, What can I do...It's her job.I hope she enjoyed it" !
That's was it. I smiled, because I knew how lucky I was. I think there was trust there. Lots of trust.
I really was very lucky. He was a calm character. My Ex was never really jealous ( the unhealty level of jealousy you actually don't want)...He could handle it. He could handle me and my career.
Maybe that is why the relationship lasted almost 5 years...

Yes, I realise that, in future, people with "normal jobs", my next boyfriend or partner may not be SO understanding (Mr.J.G if you are reading it- I'm saying Hello to YOU:-) with a big smile, do you remember my play??)

Coming back to " kissing"...
I was thinking if I KISS different in life and on screen.
I like to think that I am leaving and saving a little part of me for someone special, after hours....
But does it mean that the kiss on screen does not look as REAL, as the one during my private time...my dates?
I hope not.

It's always so funny for me, when I can feel and see the whole crew is in this anticipation on set,
Before the KISSING scene,or sex scene even more...
Waiting for THAT ONE scene, for the first take..." How they gonna kiss? I wanna see..." Hearing behind my back...:-) Now then....after 5 takes and close-Ups No one cares anymore, s it's "old" haha -They've already has seen it all. So, yeah, lets move on...That's what I call "professional".

I think that main difference is, the kiss on screen HAS to look good.At the end of the day, it doesn't matter how it feels for the actors involved...
In life, well, it's completely the opposite for me.
It ALWAYS has to feel great and right, and I don't care much if it looks good or bad,or just normal, it JUST a kiss . Something that camera wouldn't probably " register" with the glass eye as an"extraordinary passionate moment"...

Flip- flop love....:-)

Somehow, I have to admit, at work, when I have this special " connection" with another actor, there is the chemistry, it is really fun. And I wonder, how come I can't get it EVERY time...
I must say, I have been pretty lucky so far, to get what I need from acting partners, nearly every time-to make my intimate/ sexual scenes just realistic.... realistic for me, first of all ( super important) , and then for rest of the audience, who will pay for the cinema ticket to watch the film...
J.

31.07.2014

ACTING…in Bali...

December 2013... I was in Bali.On my own.I kept saying to myself, for a long time, that I needed a break. I said it to everyone.And what I did at the end : I took a break from my busy London life bubble to run anyway to Bali, but only because I wanted to do different kind of acting work. That is the truth, and that's what I did.

In Bali I was acting and working on myself on my own ,I wanted to have peace of mind to work even harder. I felt I came back to the times when I was studying in Lee Strasberg's Actors Studio in New York - that was the most intense time in my professional life, when it comes to working on myself as an actor.
In December 2013, it was over 6 years since I left Actors Studio and great NYC.I craved so much, just to have a little bit of mind detox.

So what I was doing with all my days over there?
Can you see how relaxed I am on the picture above?
Yeah, that's was the first step, to fully chill and not to think about anything, which is such a difficult task for me. I stared deeply into the waters, the garden pool and the ocean for hours. HOURS.

Then for the next few days I plunged myself in monologue work.I was using the music from my Ipod as emotional inspiration- I did sense memory exercises ( one full blog will be on them), I did lots of yoga and running, and If I was thinking at all, it was completely focused on WHO I am as an actor, as a woman and as a human being... And what direction I want to go in NOW...What do I want to improve…?
Lots - but it always has to be done with baby steps, one thing after another. This is what I wanted to do. I must say going so far away, existing in Bali on my own for 8-12 hours a day was satisfying, I charged my batteries and even now in London, I often come back to Bali in my mind, and it feels so good.

It was also nice to play with the turtles and to have very simple feeling that life is also a pleasure.
Pure pleasure. Nothing else matters.So important.

29.07.2014

Inspiration(s).....the ONE Message...

Let's go back in time.It's Sunday early evening, a few weeks ago. I'm on my bed and I've been reading scripts all day. My eyes are closing, I'm so tired:-( and I get a message that wakes me up. Here we go:

As you can sense from the tone of this person in this What's App clip, It's not a very nice comment.S times 3 : Surprised. Shocked. Shaken- then something incredible happens.I got inspired by it. Inspired by the very last few words: " Because You are JUST JOANNA, nothing else".
I was replying in my head: Of course, I'm just Joanna- Who else can I / should I be?!

Ok, I'm not stupid, I get the negative aspect of its content, but somehow I got thinking about well ...me ...who I am and how happy I am to be that JOANNA. Then, how much I want to say and share with people, and before you know it, this blog was ready. Of course I couldn't be any other way: I had to name it JUST JOANNA. I will not disclose the author of my special inspiration - anonymous - to protect his privacy. Already said "thank you" in my first post , and I really meant it. It's not bitter -sweet. It was honest. I AM grateful.

My first designed gift from my fashion brand sponsor, I still can't tell you guys yet, who is supporting me officially,soon I promise you- but it's all very exciting!!!

So now you all know how it's all started. In the first 2 days JUST JOANNA was read by over 6700 people and after 3 days I got 352 emails about this blog ( I replied to ALL of them, that's how serious I am about this shit) and so easily all this may not have happened.
For me, I got a " message" that people are curious to know, what's happening inside the industry, and they want to have an honest answer. That's what I will be giving back. Every time.Time to say "Big Thank You, big Hug " to all of you, who took time to read JUST JOANNA.
And, Thank you to my editor, J.J. for being so amazing too!

Being inspired as an actor could be such a powerful tool.
In most cases I get inspired through my life experiences, often not the nicest ones.
Probably a bit hurtful, but one of the special qualities I have, is turning around anything and everything that has happened to me and making it into direction I want to take ...and use it in my work.That's how it works.That's what I do. That's what acting is. It's life, and this is mine. JUST JOANNA's life.

Ps. I decided to choose the picture on the top for this inspiration post.It's from a film I shot earlier this year, as MAKE-UP turned out to be such an inspiration for me to play my lead character the way I played it.It's funny, how sometimes such an "outside element" like make-up can turn out to be such a huge INSIDE inspiration...
J.

Before casting ....Do whatever the fuck makes you happy!

I came back from Jordan at the end of June and 3 days after I got an email from my agent.
"You have a casting for Nina Gold":-) Every actor knows, who N.G. is!! She is one the most respected and desired Casting Directors in the UK ( Games of Throne, King's Speech etc).
I have wanted to meet this partucular industry professional for over 6 years, and here was my chance!!

So I wanted to properly prepare, right? Of course I did, character work, script prep and working on my look for the role, pretty much anything and everything I could do. Then I thought how this was very special for me, its a unique casting/meeting and I want to do something more- I want to bring some happy energy into that room, I want to be positive and relaxed, and have a smile that comes from the inside out...
So what I can do to put my mind truly in that zone?

Well, for example, I can treat myself :-) I made a date with Louis Vuitton and it was a very successful one! New shoes for casting to feel special. It sounds silly, but I wanted to see if having this extra inch of happiness would change anything at all...

This is when an idea for a social study experiement came into my head:
I asked 10 actor friends ( those ones who I know are crazy enough to do it ) to follow my instructions and of course report back to me their opinions:

The idea is simple:
I asked them to do 1 very specific thing that makes them super happy before their next casting, and they did. They could get something new to wear for the occasion, or eat a Big Mac if that's what the desire is, or have a massage just before the casting...anything! Even something little, like buying a new shade of lipstick or a desired perfume...
My next direction was a little more complicated.
I asked them to be mindful, aware of how they feel, If they felt uneasy or uncomfortable.
During the casting experience, I suggested they focus in that particular moment, on their magic object, just for 3 seconds to get the balance, and a calm thought in their head…

Curious to know what the result was?

Well, in 9 cases they all said their casting felt great, as the activity / object made them actually very focused on how happy they felt:-) BOOM! And here I want to underline something. I didn't ask them to focus on being happy at any time, or didn't say " try to relax" , fuck that- that would never work, I asked them to focus on the one, little guilty pleasure they have...that was all.
One actor said to me that it didn't make any difference what so ever.
Well, at least my idea didn't do any harm;-) and the statistics are pretty good :
-9 out of 10 plus me, so that's 11 positive feedback!

Ps. I got a recall for N.G by the way : -) and I felt so grateful because I had amazing casting. I believe my idea worked, this time, for me. It really did.
I think it's worth a try. I will keep treating myself from time to time. Why the hell not?!
If it doesn't make my casting any better in any way, at least I will find a good, new reason to smile.

J.

27.07.2014

"Just Jordan"....-
What happens in Jordan, stays in Jordan - and .... on Youtube!

Aha, yes...that's right! I have been filming an exciting tv series in Jordan over the last 3 months.
I think that now I've had few weeks to think about this experience, I will probably
feel quite chilled and relaxed telling you ALL about it.
If I had to describe this journey in ONE word, most definitely I would say: EXTRAORDINARY!

It was amazing, unusual, surreal and damn hard! That's what acting is most of the time.
Its fucking hard work...:-) . Forget the glamour moments, they only happen in actual films like Notting Hill, not in real world....

Let's start with the fact that working in an Arabic country is so very different to working anywhere else in the world. Why- because you are surrounded 100% of the time by a different and very specific culture and language, which is unfamiliar to you..
I was playing a character called Mary, and to make the experience more interesting, Mary speaks in both English and Arabic. So I had to not only LEARN arabic so that I could pronounce it properly and it could be understood but ...of course...ACT in Arabic. That was a challenge.
I like challenges though. My script was divided into 2 parts : arabic (how to pronounce) and then with a translation in English so I know what I am saying.

The filming days went really fast, I mean super duper fast - one scene, next one, next one, one after another, close-ups, wide shots with horses, or with the Dead Sea in the background. My favourite thing was night filming, the desert at night is such a magical place to be...
Also, eating with the crew during breaks, while watching sunset in the middle of the Jordanian desert is absolutely breathtaking. I remember I thought sometimes how lucky I was to see what I saw and to work in place like that.
Now, writing to you guys, sitting on my bed in Islington seems very real and what happend in Jordan feels like it was really just a dream, a bizzare one...Oh...the camels were just chilling...walking around us...WTF?!

Jordan is a really beautiful location to be filming, most definitely, no doubt about that.
But, also it's a very HOT location to be filming. The desert has dry air, we worked long hours, the crew and cast., and me in the middle of nowhere with my natural very pale polish skin got a nice colour, not red as usual but actually brown for the 1st time, believe it or not!!

I made a few good friends in Jordan, but there were moments that were hard. I survived, obviously, thanks to those few new friendly faces I had there, and thank God for that.

I was working with two fantastic Make-Up Artists from Russia and because of those two happy girls, N. and E.:-) the hours in the make-up chair every morning were fun and relaxed and I must say, now I am fluent in russian:-)
"Practice makes Master" as they say and in this case it took just over 3 months!
How you doing Girls? Wsjo haraszo? :-)

In Amman, Jordan, I stayed in very nice hotel. I spent quite a lot time on my own and I will be super honest here, room service, a nice pool and all the other royal luxuries are fun for first 2 weeks.
Then you feel LONELY, you miss your friends, family and home.
That's how it was for me this time, but hey ....?! I am an actor that's part of my job...
Believe it or not, its hard when you don't speak much to anyone for quite a few days and weeks.

The tv series looks so amazing, really beautiful and I act in Arabic...Fuck! What a journey that was!
It's on - right now on Katar Tv and you have NO idea how funny it was to get a call from my mom last week ( she can watch the series in Poland) and hear: I'm watching you and you are on the horse, not sure what's going on, but it's quite exciting.Yes, mom...of course it is...!

In the end, what I am the most happy about, is that I created a character that I can be proud of!
And it wasn't easy to do it this but I stayed focused- NO matter what.
I actually still feel very grateful to one in partucular " london friend" who was patiently listening to all my crazy thoughts, when I was out there.
I will keep the Jordan experience in my mind for a long time!
I think I learnt there. Yes I did, a lot, and that's what the game is all about at the end of the day...
J.

26.07.2014

And so it begins..."Just Joanna"....!
- prep for new filming JOurney in Wales!

"Just Joanna" ....!
Ok. Here we go. After 3 years of rejecting the idea of writing a blog, when the proposals to do so were coming out of nowhere...!? ( Why the fuck me and also the offers were mostly fashion brands / lifestyle blog offers in which I'm Not INTERESTED/so not interesting)....
I've changed my mind...

...And decided to create a blog!
I am dedicating my writing to my biggest and only, lifetime passion ...ACTING...of course.
I will be sharing with you my personal views on the exciting, yet harsh industry that I am so fortunate to be working in. Some aspects of it will be brutal, some will be warm, but it will always and most definitely be honest.

I created the site all on my own, although I must admit I have a huge fashion brand supporter, which, for now will remain unknown to you, the public. I guess you will find out in due time.

Instead of the word " blog" which I actually can't bear, I've decided to use the name " backstage" for the part of the site where all new posts will be appearing. BACKSTAGE - because the info will come from the backstage of my film sets, castings, industry meetings, and often just "backstage" of my mind..... that part of my mind, which is tightly connected to and responsible for all the random thoughts I may/ will have about my acting world.
I will try to tidy them up a bit, before I put them here though, don't worry!

Oh....And why, or should I say 'how' did " Just Joanna" become the name of this site? I promise I will tell you this one day, but for now -I will just say thank you L.S. for such unusual inspiration...

Ok , let me tell you about..... my NEW journey.

So I am going to Wales, super soon, for the first time in my life. No, actually tha'ts a lie, I have been there before ;-) but I have never filmed there. I start working on feature film with a new crew and cast and it's like... well...like starting a new family- because that's what we are creating, a film family, that will spend an insane amount of time together and for good or bad, we bond in a fast, almost unnatural, way.

It's just crazy to spend 16 hours a day with hundreds of people you don't know, I mean everyday, EVERYDAY for weeks, months and then...guess what? You never ever see them again, at least not in that very connected, close kind of sense being stuck together on location or on set.

It's always so exciting to start working on new film, a new story, a new script and you begin this journey but you never quite know how it will end. As you can see in the picture, it's all coffee and pages, papers with the name of MY character on it...:-) This is where the magic starts, when I create a character, a real person, that will talk, walk, have sex, think, feel and live in the created reality on the screen FOREVER.

The word for today is EXCITED, I'm excited about Kate, my new character.I'm starting to make space in my heart and in my mind for a new friend. As Dexter says: " Do you wanna play? - Yes!!! I really, really do!"....
J.